I’m sitting in my kitchen right now at 8:10 on Thursday morning. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. I’ve been sitting here since before 6 o’clock this morning. That’s probably a little bad. Waking up isn’t a bad thing. I have been trying to do that a little more consistently (not quite THIS early though…). Here’s the bad thing for me, and I know I’m not alone. Musicians are quirky creatures. We like things to be a certain way and we seem to not work as well when they don’t work out. As a result, we obsess about things and hope that they go well. No matter what they say, musicians always obsess about music and concerts and upcoming shows.

Just in case you didn’t know, I am a musician. I am a musician who has a concert coming tomorrow night. If you haven’t heard the news, here’s the info. I am really excited about this concert because I love this aspect of being a musician. I love sitting on a stage and being able to interact with the people that are in the audience. It’s not an easy thing to do, and I love watching people that make it look effortless. And it’s something that I strive for when I do shows as well. Also, for those of you who know me, you know my heart and passion for music and worship. If you haven’t read it before now, here it is here. So trying to make sure that all of these things are portrayed in one evening is a big deal for me. How does that play out in my head? It plays out like this…

I tried to go to bed around 11:30 or midnight last night. I laid there and sort of slept for about 6 minutes. I spent the rest of the night tossing and turning. I had one of the most retarded dreams I’ve ever had. Something on the lines of going to an outdoor church service where the whole thing was sponsored by Bud Light and they had this HUGE holographic display. Then halfway through the sermon time, someone screamed that the piano player (not me) had JUST caught H1N1. Everyone ran off screaming and it just got more and more awkward from there. Anyway, around 5:30 I couldn’t take it anymore so I got out of the bed. I had been laying there thinking about intros and breaks and chord changes and harmonies and what I’m going to say and what the lights should look like and if the recording will work and how many people will show up and if any one will enjoy it…

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I started writing out song structures and laying out how the night will look. All I can say is that I’m in full obsession mode. Will it matter? Probably not as much as I think it will. Either way, it’s where I am. I hope that many of you can make it tomorrow night. My friend Liz Hitt is opening for me and she’s pretty good. This should be a fun night and I’m excited for it. I am blessed to be surrounded by some great friends and musicians and can’t wait to share this music with them and you if you show up. For information about the church and where it is, here’s a link to the church.

Pray for me that I can get some sleep between now and tonight’s rehearsal and tomorrow’s show. Did I mention that I am jumping on the highway Sunday after this CRAZY weekend? Yeah, I’m nuts!! Oh well…

I’d like to announce to you all that the beginnings of the new website are up! Yes, it’s true. Worship180.org is officially up and working! Thanks to my buddy, Charlie, who has been helping me get things up and running, there is a website to go to now. As of right now, you can find there what you see here, but the format is different and you can see the new logo/banner. There has been a lot of work put into this and even more to come, but I am excited about what has happened already. Things to look forward to: Once we start to put some things in place, there will be a page for tour dates and opportunities to worship together. I’m also doing what I can to get some more video and hopefully some audio up in the near future. I’m working on getting some recorded so maybe we can have some sneak peeks posted. Keep checking in.

There’s a lot of great things happening right now. I’m currently sitting in Kaldi’s Coffee in Chesterfield Valley getting myself prepared for rehearsal at Rockwood Baptist in a couple hours. I’m also putting some music together for tomorrow night’s rehearsal. That’s gonna be fun as well. OH! Something else I almost forgot. Me and a couple of my favorite guys, Daniel Meyer, Evan Pitchers and Tim Schafer are going to be playing at the Gateway House of Prayer Friday night from 10pm-12am. If you want to come and worship with us for a couple hours during the Watch for the Lord, come join us. While I’m sitting here, I think I’m going to put a quick page together with upcoming dates and stuff like that. I’m singing in a few different place over the next month.

Before I go, I want to just say that God can truly bless you even in an intense storm. I am totally speaking from current experience. Even when things seem so out of whack and we don’t know where money is coming from or what utilities we will be able to keep, God is still working in ways that continue to surprise me. As I sit here right now, I don’t know what you might be going through, but I do know that God can handle whatever that is. He has that kinda power. He is GOD! Just in case you were wondering…

In the quiet, in the stillness I know that you are God. In the secret of your presence I know there I am restored…

There is no one else for me, none but Jesus. Crucified to set me free, now I live to bring Him praise… -Brooke Fraser

Have you ever thought about what it means to really just be quiet and still before God? How much time do you actually spend in the stillness? I am the first to admit that I don’t spend much time in quiet. My life is crazy busy most of the time and I really miss those opportunities.  What is the verse of this song saying? It says that in the presence of God when you take the time to settle down and spend some time with him you get that restoration that your heart so desperately needs. How does that time look for you? Are you struggling to figure out when that time is right now? How important is it for you to have time where you let God restore your heart? Important enough to let some things go?

Right now, I am in the process of talking to 4 different churches about my future as a worship pastor. I never thought I’d be in this situation, but here I am. Let me tell you…if this process is anything like today has been, this is going to be a busy season in my life. However, I know that if I don’t take the time to be still before God and let Him restore my heart and mind, I’m not going to be my best as I let Him lead me in my decision making. I could very easily do something that He’s not calling me to do. As I write this, I realize that blogging is one of those quiet times for me. My life flows through my fingers during these times and it’s therapeutic for me. God speaks to me during these times and I’m able to just be…

You should try it sometime. You will be surprised at what He might tell you. I know I was…

So, this year has already brought challenges in my life. I expected it to, because life always brings challenges. I didn’t think that I wouldn’t get through 10 days before things started to happen. Oh well, that’s life I guess. I think that God is getting me ready for something big…something I haven’t quite imagined yet. I don’t really know WHAT God has for me right now, but he doesn’t do anything half way. Here’s what I do know. I’ve been called to lead people in worship through song and I’ve been given a gift that I cannot take for granted. I know that if I’m going to do what it is I want to do I have to just step out and start doing it. I am preparing myself to move forward. I don’t know what that means quite yet, but I’m writing again. I’m even going as far as starting to set up possible opportunities to sing. For those of you that know me, this is a big deal. I don’t normally just promote myself. I don’t really know how to do that.

Anyway, I’m asking for your prayers as I attempt to step out of a comfort zone that has been there for a really long time. I’m quite scared, but I want to be obedient to God. Pray that I can listen to God AND respond the way I’m supposed to. That’s been the big issue for me. I have been running from some things because I’m scared of the outcome because I can’t see it. I need to start following God’s lead. Believe it or not, I’m not that great a leader…

I am called to lead people in worship. I am called to minister to people through song. I am called to be a servant. I am called to be a leader. I am called to help people unite their hearts with Christ. I am called to help people turn away from the distractions of life and focus on the God that saves and sings over us.  I can’t do any of that while I’m looking backwards and holding on to my fears. I can only do that if I turn around and begin to move forward. So lead the way, God, lead the way…

Okay, so the title was a BIT much, but at least you looked at it.

I was reading about my friend David and ran across the passage in 2 Samuel 6 when David was dancing before the Lord as they brought the Ark back to Jerusalem. This struck me in a couple different ways. The first thing that stood out was that Michal was upset that he was doing that and called him on it later, but we’ll get to that. The other thing was the completely uninhibited worship that David gave to the Lord. Now, I’ve read this passage many times, and I’ve always taken notice of it. But as I look through the redefined filter, I see something that excites me. Yes, we have heard it mentioned that David danced out of his clothes, or that he didn’t care who was around because he was dancing to the Lord. I think what made me take notice today was that David was free. That freedom came, however, after some teaching.

I recalled that David and his men, some 30,000 of them were already celebrating as they were bringing the Ark back. There was a little break in the action when Uzzah reached out to touch the Ark because the oxen slipped. When he was struck by God, David got mad, then scared and wanted nothing to do with the Ark. After 3 months of seeing someone else receive the blessings of the Ark, and I’m sure there were some conversations with God, he realized that the Ark was good and he must complete the mission at hand: getting the Ark back to Jerusalem. David’s understanding of who God REALLY was and his plan for the covenant brought magnificent freedom in the heart and soul of King David.  It was THEN that he was seen dancing in his underclothes. I think you really have to be dancing hard to dance completely out of a layer of clothing!

So what am I saying? True worship and true joy come from understanding. Yes, they were already celebrating before, but it wasn’t until after Uzzah died and that time in between where God showed himself through the Ark that the Israelites realized how much they had to celebrate about. We can watch other people worship and even have a basic understanding of what it means to worship ourselves. But true, unfiltered, ‘naked’ worship comes from a deeper understanding of the God who loves us so much that he sent his son to die in our place so we wouldn’t have to. That’s a reason to jump up and down and dance with all our might. And when you’ve completely stripped away all the hindrances between you and God, you can experience something so powerful and you won’t care what you look like to others. People will approach you about how your worship looks, just like Michal did to David. But you will stand firm in knowing what God has done for you. I love David’s response to Michal in verse 22. “I will make myself yet more contemptible than this, and I will be abased in your eyes…” He was basically saying, “You ain’t seen nothin’ yet!”

Are you willing to be naked in your worship before God? Are you willing to take your worship to a new level? That really means that you have to listen to God for a better understanding of who He is and what He has done and wants to do in your life. Let Him begin to redefine your worship and you’ll start to strip away some of the ugly things that stand between you and him.

Community Life…It’s sort of a buzzword in the church. We like to use it as a catchy name for our small groups. It invokes thoughts of people being together doing life together. What does that really mean? I believe we are called to be in each others lives intimately. Knowing each other and being together in peace is what God wants for us. One of the things we overlook or input on our own is community ‘part of’ life. In the church our groups are part of our busy lives. Now I know that these are generalizations, but hear me out…

I’m a sports fan. Whenever you watch sports news or interviews, people are always talking about chemistry. It’s not only what happens on the field, but it’s the relationships and ‘life’ that happens off the field. The most successful teams always talk about how much they were like a family. Yeah, things got tough and I’m sure they fight, but they were family. The things you don’t see highly affect what you see on television or in the stadiums. What’s in the heart comes out on the field.

How does all of this apply to corporate worship? I’ve read and talked to people who have said they feel like something is missing on Sunday mornings. When you ask them about it, they feel disconnected to the people around them. Church becomes more like a concert or a conference. It is easy to get lost in the crowd and then you begin to pick and choose the things that you like and don’t like about a specific church. Then it becomes more and more about you. It makes it easy for you to choose one place over the other and jump from church to church.

We can begin to experience deeper, more intimate worship when we know the people around us that we are worshiping with. What relationships do you have with the people around you on Sunday morning? Do you really know them? Do you have any community within your church body? If there’s one thing that I’ve learned, it’s that people need community. Churches need people in community. Worship needs people that are in community. Think about what the worship in your church could look like if the people worshiping together actually KNEW each other? I don’t think I’m quite done with this thought, so there may be a part 2 to this one in the near future…

Looking at that question the answer seems pretty obvious.  But why is God’s design more important that our desire? Is it because he was here long before we were? Is it because he created us and knows much better what we need? Is it because in order for us to understand this life we have to talk to the one who started it all? YES! But is there something deeper than that? I don’t know if it’s deeper, but there’s something so cool about this to me.  I’ve struggled for a long time with my own design being opposed to God’s.  Trying to do something that’s in complete opposition to the Father is not easy or fun.  I actually found that out as a teenager living at home.  I thought I knew what was up because I was a teenager and I had a job.  But my father was always trying to help me and set me up to pass.  He had all these ‘rules’ and ‘plans’.  I didn’t want rules and plans.  When I look back at those times, I realize now that if I had been more aligned to what my father was trying to show me, I probably would have had more freedom than what I had.

As I put that into a larger perspective, I think about my life and how I think it should go. When I see things happen around me, I wonder what would happen if everyone would just stop and listen to me. How cracked up is that? Anyway, I have to step back and listen to God and hear HIS designs and plans. As I dig into that point even more, I realize that I’ll be doing even better if I stop trying to live in opposition to the father.  That’s when Psalm 37 starts to become more and more clear. Delighting in the Lord has nothing to do with me and everything to do with him.  I’m not trying to please him so he gives me everything I want. I need to be positioning myself to fit his will for me.

As I always try to do, I want to find a way to make this fit in with today’s worship scheme. I’m not calling anyone else out, I can only talk about myself. The rest is up to you. But when we worship, are we looking for the worship that we desire, or the worship that God has designed? Have we commited our worship to him so that he can act? Or are we searching for what looks and sounds and feels good to us? I believe that if we are looking more to our desire than God’s design, we need him to come and ‘redefine’ what our worship should look like to him…

“Lord, I pray that you would help me to trust in you. I want to align my heart with yours so I can know what your design for my worship is. I want to give you all that you deserve. Help me step out of the way so that you can have all of me. Blessed be your name…”

“Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will act.” Psalm 37:3-5

That is such a loaded statement.  It doesn’t seem like it would be to hard to follow, but we seem to have a hard time doing in consistently.  I wonder why that is.  As Christians, our desire should be to worship God for everything that he has done.  But so many other things get in the way. The awes of life and the many distractions pull us away from what we are to be doing.  This line is so powerful because in Revelation it is being said to someone who is a follower of God. John is writing the book of Revelation and is constantly amazed by the things that are being revealed to him.  At this point he had seen SO much and was trying to sift through everything the Lord had shown him.  I have to believe he had to be overwhelmed and a little over stimulated with everything and began to worship the angel that was there with him.  But the angel was quick to readjust his focus.  He told him to worship God.

So many times we get focused on the things going on around us.  During these times in our country and world it is so easy to get distracted by all the news and recession and gas prices and lack of money.  But God has never changed and he never will.  So what am I saying to you? I’m saying that even though there are so many things vying for your attention, you need to stop, refocus, and worship God. He’s got all the answers and he has everything in his control.  It may not look like it and therefore you may continue to try and fix things on your own.  But trust me when I say this, he knows so much more than you and I. So instead of focusing on the money and the commercialization of Christmas and buying presents, worship God.

“I John am the one who heard and saw these things. And when I had heard and seen them, I fell down to worship at the feet of the angel who had been showing them to me. But he said to me ‘Don’t do it! I am a fellow servant with you and with your brothers the prophets and all of who keep the words of this book. Worship God!’” Revelation 22:8-9

So, I’ve been working on a song for the new CD project. Since I’ve changed the name of the ministry to worship180 and purchased the domain name worship180.org, I’ve been working hard on trying to define what God wants this ministry to be. I’ve also been thinking of ways to express my feelings through song. So I’ve decided that the worship CD project is going to be called Redefine. I have been working on a title song as well as other things and things are starting to come together.

I’m excited to say that the ball is rolling on the new title song for the project. I thought I would share what we have so far. All I really have is the chorus/hook part, but it is going to be good. Oh, did I mention that I’m co-writing this song with Kaleb Krueger? I’m pumped about it. Here’s what we have so far…

The canvas of my heart, Lord
Lies open here before You
Rearrange, redeem, renew my spirit

Time has drawn so many
Lines of limitations
Come shape my life to Your design
Redefine…

This thing is really starting to come together and I can’t wait to see what is going to happen from here on out. Keep checking in because it can only get better…

So, I’ve finally gotten to the point where I can start to put some of this stuff down. As some of you know, I’ve been dealing with this idea for a little while, and God won’t let me put it down. So now I’m working through the details of what it all means. I want to share with you my thoughts about this concept, and then use this space to share other ideas, praises, prayers and anything that God is sharing with me.

So what is redefine, anyway? Well, it started in my mind as a way to lead people to the cross. I’m a worship leader, so by design my goal is always to find a way to lead people in worshiping Christ. But as I thought about it, worship leaders should be leading that charge all the time. We always say things like “Worship is a Lifestyle” and “Worship should be in our hearts all the time.”, but how can we lead in that? We have to start working on people’s hearts and minds to help them realize that worship is more than just what happens during that hour or so on Sunday morning. Worship is something that happens all the time, whether we realize it or not. We were created to worship, and no matter who we are, we all worship something. So the question is, what are we worshiping when we are not at church?

The concept of redefine is a two-fold concept. The first ‘fold’ deals with those of us already involved in the church. Like I said before, worship has to be more than just something that happens on Sunday morning. Well, how do we do that? And more importantly, how do we get others to realize that? The gospel. The gospel is the only thing that never changes, and it continues to show us our inadequacies. At the same time, it continues to show us that our Savior is there to fill in the void. In order to see that, we have to have a daily ‘redefinition’ of the severity of the gospel in our lives. That will lead us to a deeper, more intimate worship with Him everyday.

The second ‘fold’ deals with those outside the church. If I’ve learned nothing in my life, I know that there are 2 things that bond people like no other; sports and music. We want to use music to engage those outside of our walls, and then help us to create relationships with them that are real. Our goal is for everyone to come to a saving knowledge of Christ, but we aren’t seeking that to the detriment of the relationship that could be built. So we do things that help them see that Christians aren’t all about just saving them to pad stats and numbers. We want to know people and touch hearts. And you can learn a lot about a person by knowing what they listen to and why…

The purpose for this is to be a ministry to ministers. As I worship leader, I know how hard it is to make this concept make sense within the church. However, this is more than just a ‘consultant’ job. I want to help spark real conversation about worship that is real, relevant and God-glorifying. I can also sing a little and I can help in reaching out to your community with music.

This is all still coming together and I would love some ideas and thoughts about how to hone this idea in and make it more laser beamy. I know I just made that up, but oh well…this is my blog! I don’t plan for the others to be THIS long, but thanks for reading.